If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
