There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
