Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize