I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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