wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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