I think scott just propositioned me for sex
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
