'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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