May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
