Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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