I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
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you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
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Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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