I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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