What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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