My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.