doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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