Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
