I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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