he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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