i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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