You really coming over, don't trick.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
