I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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