you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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