I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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