That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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