white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
