if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
