she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
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My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
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Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.