So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
