i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
