Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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