whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
