I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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