So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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