Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
