Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
