I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
