Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
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We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
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Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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