Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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