Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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