Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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