Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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