Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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