he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
