At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
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