dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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