Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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