before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
