R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
