After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
