If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
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The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
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Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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