So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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