I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
She announced her abortion via fbk
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
