a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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